Q: My 14-year-old daughter has informed me that she now has a 16-year-old boyfriend and wants to go out on dates with him. I am concerned that she isn't old enough to date, but she says that most of her friends are already dating. What is a good age for teens to date?

A: There is no magic age at which teens are ready to date. However, 14 seems a little young to go out on a date alone. Teens need to take small steps in dating. Going out with a group is a good first step. This will give your daughter a chance to get to know the opposite sex without the pressure of intimacy. Just remember not to let your teen rush things. Remind her that she will have plenty of time to date, and she must prove that she is ready for more adult responsibilities like dating. Q My daughter is about to turn 13. She wants to date and says, "all my friends date". I do not mind her attending co-ed activities, but I think she is too young to date. When is a good age to start dating? How should I handle this? A By age 13 most girls have discovered that they like boys. They want to spend time with them and learn as much as they can about them. However, the general consensus is that 13-year-old girls are too young to be dating. The concept of dating is different for a 13-year-old than for a 16-year-old. You mentioned that you do not mind if your daughter attends co-ed activities, but are these supervised activities. If your daughter is able to spend time with friends in a co-ed setting that is supervised, she will learn social skills that will become more important as she grows older. The supervision will allow her to have the added support and protection from an adult. It is not uncommon for adolescents to use the, "All my friends are doing it," line when they want to pressure parents into giving them permission for something that otherwise would not be granted. Be prepared to hear this line frequently, followed by, "It's not fair," if you set a limit that they do not agree with. If you feel that your daughter is too young to date, use that as your foundation to set your limit. Explain to her what she will not be allowed to do (for example, go out with her date unsupervised). There are no set standards or rules as to what age a teenager can begin dating. This depends on the adolescent's level of maturity and ability to deal with the pressures of dating. However, a general age when some parents allow their teens to begin dating is sixteen.

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